Couple Screaming at each other

Healthy Anger

My 17-year-old daughter, Ariel is a wise young woman. She grew up in a holistic household with both parents recognizing the body-mind connection. I have been a hypnotherapist and energy healer since she was a small child. Taking responsibility for your own health is something I am a huge proponent of.  She has come to recognize how holding onto anger can cause health problems. As she rushed into my office where I was writing recently, she excitedly exclaimed, “My jaw finally released after 2 years!” Then she went on to ask me, “What does your jaw represent? Surrounded by an air of responsibility she knows that an emotion she was holding onto caused her jaw to be stuck in an uncomfortable state these past two years. We have never rushed to the doctor to resolve health issues unless it is a last resort. Which is why I feel that we are all so healthy. We don’t take medication even for a headache.

Ariel at El Royo Beach near Santa Barbara

Every physical ailment has an emotional component

Louise Hay broke through barriers in the early 80’s when she wrote, You Can Heal Your Life. She carefully explains how each illness is rooted in our self hatred and loathing as well as our emotions. This book has helped me resolve so many of my own health issues, from a simple cold all the way to Fibromyalgia and Cancer. Self love and anger are at the root of most illnesses with variations on those themes.

Knowing that we grind our teeth and clench our jaws when angry I was quickly able to let Ariel know that her jaw relaxed when she released the anger she had been holding onto. 

She had recently broken up with her boyfriend. Of course he cannot be blamed for any of this, Ariel has created the issues that caused her anger, and takes responsibility for that. She recognized that she had been angry with me since I pulled her out of the very affluent Milton High School in Alpharetta, Georgia to move to Boulder, Colorado in the fall of 2011. The school was so large, Ariel was falling between the cracks. I knew that if she was going to succeed in high school, she needed a different environment.

Muir Woods, San Francisco, CA

Anger Needs To Be Released

Ariel was angry with me for the move, although the change netted her a school more suited to her success and a large group of true friends, that supported her and cared for her. Her anger was also directed towards her father that fought and won shared custody. Ariel was very angry she did not get to live with me full time. Having to lug her belongings back and forth each week was exhausting and un-grounding for her. Although her relationship with her father was much closer than it would have been  had I been given full custody, her resentment built and she directed that emotion towards her father.

Her father was  strict disciplinarian, which meant he would not tolerate Ariel venting her anger towards or in his presence. Anger built and came to a head in her jaw. The emotion was lodged there because it could not be released. Enter Ariel’s now ex-boyfriend. Ariel had a great deal of unexpressed anger towards him for lying and cheating on her. She had a very direct conversation with him the night before and finished it the day her jaw released. I helped Ariel connect the dots explaining, that she had resolution, and was able to express how she felt about being betrayed. Ariel was able to positively release her anger towards this young man in a constructive way, which allowed the physical release of her locked up jaw.

Had my daughter not been able to have such a constructive and open dialogue with her ex-boyfriend, she might have continued to hold this anger until it became cancer. Cancer, according to Louis Hay comes from deep and long-standing resentment and hurt. It also comes from deep grief or a secret eating away at the self. 

Ariel Resuta at El Royo Beach, CA

 

Rage Is NOT an Option!

Being able to talk about our feelings is paramount not only for maintaining a healthy body, but also to keep our relationships on an even keel. I recommend cathartic screaming on a mountain top, or in the woods far away from anyone. If that is not possible, going to a batting cage and hitting baseballs, swimming or running hard will help to shift your anger into a manageable emotion that you can then discuss with your loved ones.

Raging on another person is never called for. If you cannot control your emotions to be able to speak kindly without screaming at someone, you have got to seek professional help as you could endanger your partner, spouse or child. 

Raging can lead to abuse

Rage was a common emotion in my household growing up. I grew up in fear of men. As an adult when someone raised their voice to express themselves, I immediately was taken back in time to when my mother and father had a huge fight and abuse was a constant threat. 

Denial About Abuse

Most people are in denial about their abuser and abuse. A man does not have to hit a woman to be an abuser. Balling up a fist and threatening to punch someone is just as bad as hitting someone. Hitting a wall beside someone’s head is abusive also. When you walk around as if you are walking on egg shells, afraid to question your partner or spouse’s behavior, you are being abused. If your spouse or partner puts you down, belittles you or tells you that you are good for nothing. You are being abused. Abusers very rarely change. They may try. But they cannot. These patterns come from their childhood and are deeply rooted. Even when raised with abuse in your household as a child, change in behavior has to come from experiencing deep enough pain to want to make serious and monumental changes. When I was a young mother, I modeled the behavior I had been taught by my parents. It took diligent effort, therapy, hypnotherapy and a lot of energetic work to change my behavior. 

Energy Clearing to Release Energetic Patterns

The energy work I do with my clients releases the patterns rooted deeply in the unconscious mind. An energy healing can create deep and lasting change when the patterns are removed from the root of the pattern. In 95% of the issues we have come from past lives. Loving yourself enough to want to make lasting change is key. Rage, abuse and negativity are low vibrational expressions, Raising your vibration through energy clearing, daily Spiritual practice and diligent efforts can be assisted by hiring Jennifer, the Self Love Guru to help you through situations and difficulties that are emotionally debilitating like break-ups, divorce or the loss of a loved one. 

Health Issues Caused By Unreleased Anger

Headache
Digestion problems, such as abdominal pain
Insomnia
Increased anxiety
Depression
High blood pressure
Skin problems, such as eczema
Heart attack
Stroke
Cancer

Do you love yourself enough to get the help you need? Call Jennifer today at
 (770) 480-5500.

No Comments

Post a Comment