Positive Body Image Contributes To Better Sex
By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters
Are you naked healthy? Do you feel good clothed or naked? Or do you quickly undress and slip under the covers and hope no one notices?
We may long to have the perfect body. Looking around, there are not many that have a perfect model’s body. It is important to feel beautiful just to be you. It is possible. You don’t have to be a bathing suit model like Adam Gates, above. (This is my son in the photo.) Great genes? Maybe. He works very hard to maintain his body. He is a fitness coach AND a model. It is his profession.
The truth is that we can feel good about our own body by being accepting. It does not take a perfect body to feel sexy and attractive. The happier you are being you, the happier you will be with your body. The more comfortable you are with your body, the better you will feel getting naked.
Being naked exposes not only your body, but your confidence or lack of. When you feel good about yourself, it does not matter that your breasts may be resting on your abdomen, or that your belly is round rather than flat. Looking at yourself naked, do you see beauty or do you see fat and ugly? Changing your perspective and self talk will change the way you feel without changing who you are.
Standing in front of the mirror telling yourself that you love you can feel a little funny. Put your hands on your butt and tell yourself, “I love my butt!” Put your hands on your belly and tell yourself, “I love my belly!” Standing naked in front of the mirror look at yourself and mean it when you say, ” I love all of me!” The more love you give to yourself, the more accepting you will be.
As we get older, age can shift body parts. Many of us don’t look quite like we did when we were in high school. Yet, how we view ourselves is more important. Rather than focusing on your belly being fat, why not accept yourself as you are and say, “I love my body.” The more loving and accepting of yourself, as you are – the better. The more comfortable you are with your body, the more you will enjoy sex when it happens. If you are busy focusing on how you look naked, you won’t be able to let go and enjoy the moment. For women, that can mean the difference between having an orgasm or not.
Remember the key ingredient to great sex is being able to surrender to the moment and focus on the pleasure. You won’t be able to when you are thinking about how heavy you have gotten. Some women have a poor body image but have gorgeous bodies. It is a matter of perspective.
|Atlanta photo shoot – Adam Gates|
When we use negative self-talk (telling ourselves we are fat, or look awful) is not supportive. We can become depressed and not want to walk or go to the gym. Instead love yourself enough to want to get your body moving. Beating ourselves up for the cookies, chocolate and ice cream we ate over the winter is not going to help us feel better. Instead use the opposite tactic. Affirm that you love your body. You love your body so much that you will take care of it like you would a little baby. You wouldn’t give an infant Oreo cookies and ice cream daily, would you? Of course not! Cut back on one of your indulgences a little each day. Allow yourself a cheat day once a week to have something you love.
Eating healthy and regular exercise is important. Taking care of our health can keep us young, vibrant and sexually active longer. If we become overweight, our heart may labor and we may have high blood pressure. Blood pressure medicine can impede love-making by getting in the way of an erection.
Limiting sweets and eating more fruit, vegetables and drinking more water can help us become healthier. The immediate issue though is how we feel about our bodies.
Here are a few suggestions to assist you to feel better about your body right now:
- Stop telling yourself that you are heavy, fat or overweight.
- Begin telling yourself how beautiful you are – daily.
- Look at yourself in the mirror each day naked, and say, “I LOVE MY BODY!”
- If you are wanting to lose weight; instead of focusing on the negative, tell yourself that you are getting thinner and thinner every day! You mind will move into action and make it so. (This is a hypnotherapy tactic to access your unconscious mind).
- Every night before you go to sleep tell yourself: “I love myself just the way I am!” Repeat this at least three times before sleep.
Remember that you can’t let go and enjoy sex to the fullest when you are focusing on how heavy you think you are. We need to get out of our heads and into our bodies. Instead, when you are sprawled across your lover’s bed affirm to yourself: “I am a beautiful woman.” or for men, “I am a gorgeous hunk of a man!” You will be surprised how this consciousness permeates the room. Don’t be surprised if you are told, “Wow you are so beautiful!”
Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is a life, love and sex coach. Her website is: http://www.JenniferElizabethMasters.com She empowers women and men to love themselves fearlessly. She helps women overcome sexual dysfunction and low self esteem. When we love and accept ourselves completely, we become stronger, more confident and powerful individuals. We stop looking for love outside of ourselves, because we find it inside instead. When we love and accept ourselves, we become a magnet for love!
When we love ourselves unconditionally, all of our life gets easier. We step into the FLOW, and stop pushing our energy to MAKE THINGS HAPPEN. We become allowing. Living in the present. The key to happiness is love of self. It all begins within. Jennifer is a catalyst for empowerment and self love. Healing her own issues makes her sensitive to what you are experiencing. She is intuitive cutting to the root issues quickly.