Texting – The End of Intimacy

Texting – The End of Intimacy

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

We live in an age where everyone has a cell phone, even grandparents. We text instead of call and we call instead of visit in person. How long has it been since you and your best friend got together in person and looked each other in the eyes to talk? How easy is it to tell someone through a text that you are done with them? 


Teens are breaking up by texts, but they are not the only ones. Texting to me is the way to pretend to connect when we are not really wanting to. Texting gives the pretense of connection. But a text is not connecting. 

We are free disassociating. Teens don’t answer their phones, we text our lovers, rather than call them in the morning and spend inordinate amounts of time on the computer. Where is the intimacy? Where is the connection?


You can’t make love to a computer. You can’t make love through a text. Sure you can get turned on by sexting, but again, that is dissociative behavior. We are separating instead of coming together. We are dividing instead of meeting. We need to see each other face to face to see the truth in each other’s words. If we can’t see a person’s face, they could be lying through their teeth. When we speak in person, we can read a person’s face. We hear the intonation in their voice and we can tell if what they are saying is truth or lies. 

When we text as a means of communicating, we are not getting closer, or staying connected. That is utter bull honky! We are lying to ourselves about what texting is. It is a disconnected means of communication in which we use it to continue to be disconnected rather than connected. Texting blocks intimacy. It allows us to be emotionally unavailable. 

For some texting allows connection to multiple people. It allows a person to date multiple people without much of a commitment in time or energy. It comes from fear. Rather than faith. I don’t know about you, but I am giving up texting for the summer! 
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